Not that this is a rubber stamp on the sexes saying “this is or isn’t how they are”. It is more an observation that I have made over the years of training voice talent. That observation is: Though everyone is nervous to some degree when they start sessions at the studio, there is something that men do much more often than women, and I wish they wouldn’t… because there is just no need for it.
For those of you who have never met me in person, I’m kind of a man’s man. I work on cars, love football, do my own construction. I’m rather handy with tools and power equipment. I’m a big guy. (Maybe some find that imposing I guess.) I’m known to show up in the studio in a football jersey and ball cap on Saturdays. (I’m not so in love with myself that I’ll keep telling you about me for too much longer 🙂 )
Anyway, given that description I can see how when another guy comes to the studio for lessons they are occasionally struck with that uncontrollable urge to be “a guy’s guy” too – and harumph-harumph their way around the studio and through the lesson and not be anything but a guy’s guy for a while.
I kind of expect it at first and usually it goes away. I hope that it will fade after or during the evaluation. That way when it comes time for lessons, I’m not trying to fight through it. You see, here is the problem:
When a guy is pre-occupied with being a guy rather than focusing on being a voice talent, very little actually gets done in the studio. They’re afraid to make a mistake while reading the copy (making mistakes is not something a guy’s guy likes to own up to, I should know). So they dance their way through the read with that John Wayne-esque “Howdy, I’m readin copy partner, so just you sit back and listen ya’ hear!” which usually sounds like anything other than the way the copy is supposed to sound.
Now we all know that this is not proprietary of voice talent, it’s proprietary of guys. We don’t want to ask for directions, we know how to do it without looking at the directions, we can take it all apart having never done it before and put it all back together as good as new (Yeah right…). This type of behavior does prevail and dominate the sex, but it doesn’t mean we’re bad people, just misguided, immature and dumb (right ladies?)
I’m sure that at least some of the ladies have that opinion. I’ll buy the misguided and immature part, but dumb.. Come on, we’re not dumb. Just stupid…:) Actually, I don’t know what it is, other than being part of the culture of being a guy.
What that culture dictates in the voice over studio is that guys sometimes have a hard time settling down and being ok with making mistakes in front of anyone, let alone me. I think it is also that no one wants to look silly in front of a coach. Trust me, no matter how hard you try, when you are doing something for the first time in front of anyone who has been doing it for a while, you are going to look a little silly. My job as a coach is to look beyond that silliness and get down to the core quickly, allowing a talent to find their way out of the silly phase as fast and as painlessly as possible.
When a guy is preoccupied with being a guy and not making mistakes, he is making it near impossible to direct him, and is missing the true point of voice over coaching. I am not here to teach a person how to read every piece of copy as a guy’s guy. I am here to teach them how to read the copy the way it was intended to be read and with the right attitude, inflection, pace and emotion. If the only emotion the talent is capable of demonstrating is that of a tough guy’s guy, it makes it kind of hard to deliver a piece of Pampers copy.
Guys need to realize when they get into this, that no one out there is going to pay them to sound cool, or smooth, or tough unless they can demonstrate the ability to sound any of the three ways and more. Learning how to convey those three emotions or states will forever elude the voice talent who only wants to be a guy’s guy. That can be a tough nut to crack when the “guy’s guy” is the guy they’ve been listening to in their head all their lives.
Guys…You need to settle down, and even if it takes a lot of practice, be ok with the fact that when you begin to pursue voice over, you don’t know how to do it. You can’t do it without looking at the directions. You can’t do it by opening the hood and looking under it pretending to know what you are looking at. You can’t do it by picking it up and jumping on it and riding it until you learn how to keep it upright. You have to be shown by someone, and that’s ok. You at least need to get to a point where that is ok, or you’re in for a bumpy ride.
I have noticed over the years that the older, more mature men who come by the studio are much better at letting it be ok to not know how to do it. But sometimes we guy’s guys just refuse to grow up..
By comparison, I have found that most if not all women who come to the studio are much more inquisitive. They want to know. They want to be instructed, if not why else would they be there. Though they demonstrate the same behavior as anyone else when they come across something they don’t understand, they are much more likely to stop and ask before proceeding. Yes, they actually stop and ask for directions. They seem acutely alert when tiptoeing through the tulips, and more capable of following my instructions when it comes to navigating the flowerbed. They are much less likely to put their feet down anywhere they are told not to. Occasionally they may step there by accident, but don’t usually say “to hell with you – I’ll step where I want.” That is much more of a guy thing.
When a talent, whether they be male or female, is capable of following my instructions I can accomplish so much more in the short time we have together. I am a perfectionist in many respects and will repeatedly go over something again and again until the talent gets it right. This doesn’t mean I like to repeat myself all of the time, and if I am forced to repeat myself through much of the lesson it only exhausts the talent and shortens the time they have to learn other things.
I really don’t like when a talent’s session time is eaten by me having to say the same thing over and over again. Though it is their dime, it is my agenda. It is part of my job to continually repeat things until they sink in because the talent may have not heard me clearly the first time, but if I am forced to do it because someone is refusing to listen to me, it is another story entirely.
That is where one of the key differences between men and women comes into this. I said before this is not a broad brush that applies to all, but more often than not women tend to hear me the first or second time I say something, whereas with men it often takes me a few more than one or two attempts. I don’t think it is a “Hey, I’m smarter than you” thing. I think it is a “Hey, I’m more willing to listen to you and make mistakes” thing.
Many of the women I have coached are just more willing to make mistakes in front of me sooner than men are. It is most likely because they don’t have the whole machismo issue going on when they walk in the door. Women’s lack of that issue expedites their learning process and sets them up to learn and retain the information I am providing faster, which in turn gives them the opportunity to soak in more.
My suggestion to men looking into this business is: When you venture out onto the path of learning voice over, be sure to select a path that you know has a guide along it somewhere. But don’t worry about looking at the directions first, just wander out onto the path and start walking. (That you should be able to handle.) At some point you are going to come across that guide – and this is where I want you to make the right decision. Sit down on a log next to the guide and listen to them. Listen to everything that they say and take it all in and trust it. After all, they are the guide. They are the one with the knowledge of the pathways. It is most likely the guide who walked in the forest so much, it was their feet that pressed down the leaves and grass and made the indentations in the land.
Sit with that guide for a while, and soak in their wisdom and knowledge and most of all trust it. Let what is in their head slowly become yours. Once they have taught you all you are capable of learning from them, get up, dust yourself off and return to your journey along the path. For then you will know it much better than you did before. You may find yourself still interested in the trees and rock formations that the guide didn’t bother to mention to you, but you will know in the back of your mind that your feet continue to fall where they should.
Remember the guide and all that they taught you; their teachings may come to benefit you when one day as you are walking the path, you stop to rest and some other lost wanderer who ventured onto the path without looking at the directions comes walking up and sits down next to you. By the time they have made it that far, they will be willing to listen… and will be ok with letting you be right.
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